By: Tanja Weixler Ban
Some time ago when I was in my first stage of my life there were a lot of trial and error events. These events were my great test of survival. Survival in a sense of who I associate with, what I do, and in which environment I move. I always knew, or rather waited (I know now), the information that would fill in the missing parts of my constant returning questions… What am I doing here, on this planet? What is the point of waking up in the morning? and during the day someone tells me what I have to do, should do, and how to do something, and then I go to sleep. Why does this repeat every day? It felt totally meaningless.
During my first 30 years, I was partially disappointed (now I can call it frustration) and partially angry. How is it possible that someone like me, with a lot of knowledge, expert in every part of what I did, and was interested in my work and it felt like I had been doing it a long time, was never noticed or hired for these talents? This occurred in my relationships as well and I experienced a lot of trial and error with long bonds with others. I lived with years of frustration deep inside me although I looked happy on the outside – what an illusion. In my work I felt I had to move on. I realized every time I did not look going to work in the morning. I was always frustrated and changing jobs trying to search for a career that would suit me.
While others felt good in smaller groups, I certainly did not fit in and my system/mechanics wouldn’t allow it. I wondered “what’s wrong with me?” Every time there was a small group (3-5 people), I started to withdraw from the environment. No one ever asked me anything, or rather, if I wanted to participate in the conversation, my words were not heard. The comments I made were more »advanced than their hours of discussion (probably due to my independent assimilation). Even if I gave an optimal solution, it was not heard or recognized by others. I realize now that it was because I initiated. After a couple of days, weeks, or sometimes years, they eventually came to my solution as what was best. I realize now they needed their time to come to the same conclusion as I suggested at the start.
Because of these experiences I soon recognized that I had to be my own boss and be Solo rather than a small group. After that, I was under constant pressure to start something new for years. I struggled with this and it felt like everything I tried to start was a mess. I thought, how come with some much talent, ability, and energy this not working? I didn’t understand.
The events that followed were disastrous. In my second stage of live, I continued my education. I thought the problem was my education. I was constantly short on money for the necessities of life and of paying school fees. But I kept biting on with still no results. The people and environment in my life were not right for me and I didn’t feel comfortable. I always felt some restraint or resistance. I then went through a period where I withdrew form social life and it actually felt good. This lead to hope returning for me.
I eventually starting working in interior design and was doing a great job and my clients were impressed. When it came to rewarding my work clients could sometimes be difficult and not pay me when it was due. This made me not want to be around people who did not see my value and wasted my time. At this point I started to searching… What is actually in me that is not working? It must be something.
I started looking for an answer in books and then one day I came across Human Design in a book. This was just before the COVID-19 Pandemic where I was feeling a lot of pressure to make decisions I knew were not for me. And then I saw my chart, my map, my code, my special formula, my mechanics, and I just knew this would change everything for me.
These words resonated with me from Ra Uru Hu:
“What you can rely on to make decisions that are truly you, you’ve never relied on in your life. What you can’t trust, you have been trying to trust all your life. What you’ve been trusting has never been you. What you’ve been ignoring has always been you. Experiment with trusting what’s really you and see what happens.”
– Ra Uru Hu
It was so simple. All of my questions were answered. And so my journey began with a complete different understanding and perspective. I was given my perspective at birth, however, my environment imposed hard work and hard experiences that lead to me questioning life and going through difficult events such as a car accident and skin cancer. Deep inside though I always had a strong sense of hope and motivation and therefore I survived.
I was unexpectedly given an opportunity to take over the family business. At the time I had no clue about economics, was not interested, but felt I had no other choice for the survival of my family. The company was not doing well, but I committed my energy to the position of CEO. This experience ended up being meant form me to experience and learn about my own abilities. I learned more about my mechanics, that I have leadership skills, and did well working with a larger company or group. I had no foundational knowledge of how to manage larger companies, but in a short time I was able to because it is written in my mechanics. When you know you what you are good at through your mechanics you can easily master it. I was finally feeling the success.
Everyone has their own formula, their own human mechanics. I encourage you to search and discover yours. Only you have it, uniquely yours, and this is reflected in the personal and business world.
If you see benefits in this, then you are in the right place at the right time for you.
Thus, I successfully completed the BG5 Career & Business Certification training, which is the business side of Human Design. All the knowledge I have acquired is incredibly oriented towards our future – times are changing. What was in the past will no longer benefit us in the future. The era of Planning is ending. We have been here for 400 years. Working hard so we can rest on the weekend, figuring things out logically, trusting leaders that are rich and famous, trusting Outer Authorities, always planning for the growth and expansion… this however is the END of planning.
What comes next is the era of the Individual. Trusting your Inner Authority is the Key. We are going to work for deep connection; we all have our own inner knowing. It is advisable, if it is correct for you, to learn to trust your Inner knowing, using wisdom in a practical way and not to follow false enthusiasm, be selective about relationships, creativity through intuition, and what matters most is confidence in your Decision-Making Strategy, which is unique to each individual. It’s not about skills anymore which you have acquired in your life. It’s all about understanding and accepting your own mechanics and the mechanics of those around you. After that, if you are correct, you will notice no more resistance, no more panic if you made the right decision or not.
“Experiment with trusting what’s really you and see what happens.”
– Ra Uru Hu
So, good luck in the future.
I’m here (on my mountain 😊), if you are interested. I am here to share this knowledge that makes you/us feel secure, and I am actively involved in this process. I can support, share and empower you to express unique qualities that are different from the status quo.
I am 6/2 Leader / Natural. Extra fast and quick. So, I am Express Builder. My ultimate role is a Trusted Leader. I am designed to share my natural talents, and how to accept your unique gifts and talents, too. To live authentically, without being dependent on outside authorities. I am here to share broader view. Understanding individual potential, understanding beyond the interrelationship of humans.
My Life Work Theme is INDIVIDUALISM. I can shock others with my intuitive knowing and individualism, and I’m not easily influenced. So I had a need to test my formula. My mechanics.
APPROVED – Prepare for takeoff. Be the passenger at the back seat.
Let’s Make Something Different Together…
I am waiting to Respond on your Call.
