BG5 Business Institute
By Linda Brandwijk
All of my life I have had a sense of not being worthy enough and always feeling insecure.
When negative things showed up I always thought I was the one to blame. I felt like I was the one who was failing. I did everything in my power to succeed. For me success meant having a job that gave me status (striving to become a CEO), living in a big house and driving an expensive car. The older I got, the more I compared myself to others. With the success of others as my benchmark, I always ended up being ‘the loser’. Over time my mind created an unrealistic image of the successful person I thought I must become.
I felt like I was a disappointment for my parents. Since my childhood it seemed that there was always ‘something going wrong with me.’ I did not pass my exams in high school due to my fear of failure. I had trouble with certain teachers. I was required to pass an intelligence exam. I failed in mathematics and required extra help. I switched jobs all the time because nothing really seemed like a good fit. I tried starting a business just like my parents which failed. The list of failures and missteps goes on.
Of course there were lots of successful people around us: nephews, nieces and other people of my age who seemed to navigate flawlessly through life and who gained material success. It was my goal to find my purpose, to find something that would bring me status along with material success. Then, and only then (in my mind), my parents would be proud and I would be happy.
I didn’t really care about how much effort and energy it would take, I needed to reach my goal. Job after job I struggled, I experienced the same friction and confrontations over and over again. I had conflicts with managers that sometimes led to my resignation. I had discussions about growth opportunities, but felt restricted within my role so I ended up really frustrated. I was continually confirming the negative thoughts about myself, yet continued my determination to succeed – no matter what.
After years of struggling in my early thirties I had finally reached all of what I was aiming for.
I thought: “yay, I made it, now I am happy!” And yes, my parents were proud and yes, I was proud of myself, but deep inside I was unhappy and kept working harder and harder to prove that I was able to maintain my new earned status.
Until my dream exploded! The owner of the company had debts he wasn’t honest about. I ended up at home. Alone.
Without a job.
Without my network calling.
But with bills to pay.
More determined than ever I took the first job I could get a hold of, which turned out to be a disaster. Before I was even able to realize I was on the wrong track – I was involved in a car accident that turned my life up-side-down, crashed by ambitions, but turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me.
Housebound I reached rock bottom, and after two years of struggling and fighting with deep feelings of frustration and anger I ended up being hospitalized with pancreatitis as a result of a failing gall bladder. Finally, I had an excuse to ‘do nothing’ because of my illness. This actually turned out to be a blessing in disguise.
I had to surrender to life. Suddenly and miraculously things started to appear on my path. And one of those things was BG5, after all this time, finally everything that happened to me started to make sense!
I learned how I was using my energy in a very unhealthy and destructive way.
I am an Express Builder, so I have the ability to take action right away and change direction efficiently and quickly. And that’s what I did in my career – when something wasn’t ok anymore, I switched to something else backed up by my Strength of Discovery (46-29). With a clear goal of wanting to become successful I entered countless new experiences (jobs) and always met a lot of resistance, which made me more and more determined to fight (trait 38) for my goal, no matter what.
Next to fighting I was always provoking (trait 39) my managers to give me more responsibility and more money. These two traits make up a part of my Lifework of Upheaval (70% of who I am) so I was a tough cookie to handle…
And that’s not everything, because all of this was supported by my Strength of Leadership (7-31). When managers weren’t strong leaders – I would not listen to them and would do things my way which caused a lot of friction and was often the starting point to switch gears… yet again…
All of this behavior was rooted in the Shadows of my Career Design where my monkey mind became my ‘truth’:
Understanding how my shadows distracted me and how I am truly designed gave me a huge feeling of relief. I wasn’t stupid, I wasn’t failing – I was just using my gifts and talents in a wrong way and this ignorance gave my mind the chance to rule my world!
I now understand:
Pffff… what a relief! This knowledge has given me peace ever since.
By understanding my Career Design, it became clear to me that I would love to become a certified BG5 Consultant. Taking a look at my Design this career really suits me. It is amazing how everything in my Design supports this career and that it feels effortless, because this is WHO I TRULY AM.
Here are how some elements of my Career Design play out:
So here I am, studying BG5 and helping others with this amazing information.
And that’s not all, I have changed my life completely by making different choices from my gut response. I live in a much smaller house, I don’t worry about status, I am now only ambitious in being myself, I don’t want to become anyone else anymore, I started my own business and I am very happy.
And on top of that something unexplainable and extraordinary has happened physically: since this massive turn around of my life my hair started curling. I went from straight to curly hair and it feels really like the true Linda is reborn!
Linda Brandwijk – de Groot has 15+ years of wide-ranging experience in different fields like Notary, Communications, Public Relations, Events and Mediation, but never found her true purpose in life and career, until she came across BG5. She is currently in the BG5 Consultant Certification Course aiming to be certified in September 2019. She is very proud to have started her own coaching business “BG5 Coach” in The Netherlands and is finishing a book about her experiences and insights after the car accident that changed her life dramatically. Out of difficulties comes a rebirth and she is now doing the work she really loves!
Her attitude as a positive and practical problem solver, her own intense life experiences in combination with her unique way of tuning into clients and her love for BG5 makes Linda the perfect coach for everyone that needs guidance within their life, career or business. And she is just started…